i are smart (and old)

For reasons I can't begin to fathom, I've been making a large number of spelling and grammatical errors in my writing lately. I've been misspelling words that I should know how to spell, leaving out letters or accidentally adding new ones. Also, I've been omitting articles and prepositions from some sentences, and in some cases I've even omitted crucial verbs and nouns.

I was going to attribute this increased frequency in writing errors to a lack of sleep. I haven't been getting as much of it as I should of late. It would stand to follow that certain alertness-intensive skills (such as proper communication) would suffer. I was convinced this was the reason. That is, I was until today. Last night I got more than a full night of sleep, and I've felt fairly well-rested all day. And I just now made a number of avoidable mistakes in my writing.

Perhaps my brain is getting slower in my old age? I'll be 25 next week. I once stated (at the tender young age of 19 or 20) that people over 25 couldn't be trusted, because they were officially old and therefore unable to relate to young'uns. So do I eat those words now? No, because I really can't relate to 19- or 20-year-olds anymore. The things they do very often seem so immature and self-centered (he said, as if he were himself the paragon of wisdom and altruism). I was conversing with my kid sister the other day, and I uttered some slang phrase that was relevant when I was young, but somehow had stayed relevant. She told me I was too old to speak like that anymore. Sadly, I agreed with her.

I used to listen to various dark, angry musics when I was a teenager. There was no such thing as emo way back then, but I would have been right at home among the Linkin Park and My Chemical Romance fans of today. Then one day at around 20, I realized that my life didn't suck all that bad, and honestly I had a whole lot to look forward to. I couldn't be whiny or angry about anything anymore. I found I preferred music that made me feel better about myself, not the stuff that reinforced my negative attitudes. I ran out of angst. I feel much the same way now. I'm newly into Indie Rock and Pop, and I really like the music, and the scene looks pretty appealing too... but I don't think I have the energy necessary to feign hip individualistic conformity.

I've still got a few years of youth ahead of me (or at least, I'd still like a few more years of youth). I'm not even out of my mid-20s doldrums. There's nary a career or a family in sight on the horizon, and I still enjoy the freedom of young restlessness and aimlessness. So what do I do? Do I diminish, and go into the West, and remain me? Or do I rebel against father time and fight the onset of old age?

I guess as time goes on, birthdays become a time for reflection.

Oh, yeah, and by the way: I'm back. Hi.